What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

Why did my ex-narcissist move so fast with his new supply marriage engagement moving in, etc.?

True - how I loved my mum!

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

Why do I feel worthless most of the time?

What do you mean son?

What! how could you do that?

Do you know what she said mum?

Do you think trump realizes that if he significantly decreases the size of CIA, that there is a higher chance of him being assassinated?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

Why does Islam give a bad vibe?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Can ringing in the ears be a sign of spiritual awakening?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.